‘Don’t need it. Not gonna buy it’ – Kimberly Clark, 2016
If you haven’t been introduced to the concept of an ‘Anti-Haul’ before, then head over to Kimberly Clark’s channel and prepare to be addicted. The idea is that you run through items and instead of a traditional haul where you show what you’ve purchased, you talk though things that you’re not going to buy. Or as Kimberly puts it ‘What I’m not gonna byyyyy-iiiiii‘. It’s all very catchy. I’m currently working on a list of beauty launches that just aren’t floating my boat and I’ll pop it up soon either in blog post format or video, but in the meantime I thought I’d do a run-down of the fashion bits and bobs that I’d throw into my anti-haul category…
Chokers. Now I must preface this by saying that chokers or just thin pieces of leather or jewellery around people’s necks can look really bloomin’ cool, but as someone who has about five chins going on underneath my mouth, it’s just not something that I feel like I can particularly pull off. I’ve watched enough episodes of America’s Next Top Model to know that I should ‘give it more neck‘ and I feel like I’d look even more turtle wearing one. Instead I’m on the hunt for something dainty (and long!), that won’t emphasise the fact that my mouth just somehow slips into shoulders. I found this brand on Instagram called Vrai & Oro and I basically want one of everything they make. It is so ridiculously up my street, but I think customs tax on a purchase would be huge. Has anyone given them a go? Or anyone know of any U.K based equivalents?
Bomber Jackets. This is another case of just generally not being cool enough to pull something off, but you know – I’m ok with bomber jackets not being the one for me. Mary Berry looks awesome in them, but I just end up looking like my Dad in the early ’80’s. They’re a little too casual for my wardrobe and a little too sloped in the shoulders. I will say though that Everlane have just brought out a line called ‘Street Fleece‘ that features a cropped bomber and although the bomber isn’t for me, the Pocket Pullover is just the right amount of weekend chic, mixed with practical properties. Everlane when you gonna’ start shipping to the UK man?
Crop Tops. I might end up sounding like a Grandma here, but every time that I peruse Topshop and see something I like, I pull it off the rack only to find that it’s cropped and has rips/splits/holes in it in places that would make the garment very cold indeed to wear. My crop top wearing days are over and the only type of cropped top that I can get behind these days are jumpers or T-shirts that are slightly higher in the front, in order to make tucking them in easier (told you I’d end up sounding like a Grandma). The only other clothing item that I can get behind being cropped are trousers, like I mentioned in my recent wishlist post. I’m on the hunt now thanks to all your recommendations – cheers!
Ripped Jeans. I feel like my own Grandma has really rubbed off on me with this one. Last summer whenever I wore my Topshop Lucas Ripped Boyfriend Jeans she commented that she could patch up the gaping knees if I wanted her to. God I love her so much. Now I still love those jeans – they are some of the comfiest I’ve ever purchased, so I don’t think they’ll be making it onto the charity bag pile anytime soon – but I don’t think I’ll be investing in another pair for a while. It’s mainly to do with the chilly/’Damn I have to shave my knees’ factor, so I think I’ll be sticking to a classic finish for now. One thing I am in the market for though are a pair of cream jeans. I KNOW! Not black for once. I need to sit down…
Photos by Lauren Shipley